Wednesday, January 19, 2011

My safe harbor

The other night, Rosabelle was throwing an unreasonable tantrum when I told her we’re going to wash her up after she peed (she was reading some books and said she needed to go). Maybe it’s because she was in the midst of something intriguing and wanted to get back to it, but that made her angry as she cried, refusing to stand on the step stool to wash her hands, asking Nainai to carry her as she cried.

I was getting impatient and angry for this senseless crying and snatched her away from Nainai, putting her onto the step stool and washing her hands for her before wiping her face and neck roughly. She knew that I was really angry and as Nainai carried her up for me to wash her groin and feet, so she kept saying, ‘不再哭了, 不再哭了...'. I just ignored her and ranted away, and when Nainai carried her to the room, she covered her face with the bath towel, which I pulled away, as I wanted to take off her tops to wipe her armpits. That got her started again on the crying and I was most rough with removing her clothes before stomping out hastily when I was done. I absolutely have no patience for such unreasonable crying and clearly let her know I was very angry.

When she was done with dressing up, Nainai fed her gripe water and went off to bathe, leaving her to go back to the same books she was looking at before the bath. I was at the dinner table planning the next day’s meal, and Rosabelle’s back was faced to me all the time. For at least 10 minutes, she just flipped away at the pages of the book all by herself, until I asked ‘Did Nainai comb your hair for you?’ – she turned and answered meekly, ‘Comb already’, before looking back at her books again.

I could see she knew she was wrong and did not dare to offend me further, and she even got up once to look for Nainai, who was bathing, so I asked if she wanted to sit with me at the table and bring her book and markers for some drawing. After that, I reminded her again that she was naughty and cried unnecessarily, making me angry, and she went into her ‘Mummy’ tone again, indicating she knew. Nainai thinks she’s such an obedient child, consolable even when crying, and knowing that she did wrong. I at times think I should/can be more patient with her, and wonder if I am teaching her to be so short-fused and impatient with my harsh teachings. At other times, I am heartened by the fact that it teaches her that I will not tolerate any nonsense or unprovoked crying, and she then knows to stop.

That’s her with Nainai over lunch the other day, when she requested for me to take a photo of them both, heh! They are really each other’s teacher, like when Nainai asked her what Mummy meant when I said ‘Coming!’ whenever she calls for ‘Milk milk time!’. After some thought, she said, ‘来了, 来了!', which I thought a most apt and accurate translation!
Over this period, she’s been having a hearty appetite (touch wood!), maybe also because we went to the chiro’s on Sunday (as I was having a strained neck). We had lunch outside at The Place (where I even got a pair of cute denim shorts for her from Zara kids sale), eating at a Yunnan restaurant. Whilst I was looking at the menu, she went up to another table with a couple and two boys of about 9-10 years old. She called, ‘哥哥,哥哥!', then went on to say ‘哥哥嘴巴脏,快点擦擦吧!' – the poor boy was so embarrassed but the couple guffawed away, heh!

After that, we headed to Doctor D’s place, where I had my treatment first and there wasn’t any major issue with me, heh! But Rosabelle kept wanting to cry if Dr. D so much as went near her, so I had no choice but to carry her with her back facing to him, then lean against a wall as he felt awhile, then did a loud CRACCCCCK! Heh, her crying stopped as soon as he stopped touching her – apparently, T6 was out of place, causing problems like indigestion and temperaments. I told Dr. D maybe that’s why it’s Day 5 since she pooped!

Miraculously, within 10 minutes of the ‘treatment’, as she was going down the steps, she had THAT look (of needing to poop) on her face, and true enough, she probably let go of 5 days’ worth in the loo, haha! Quite amazing… I told Wayne we should learn the ropes from Dr. D and start cracking her whenever she’s constipated, wahaha… (erm… of course not – the spine is such a fragile structure, I wouldn’t want to mess with it!).

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